And I've seen thousands. I estimate about 5k movies in my 39 years on this earth. I can't remember one ever hitting me this hard. I was sweating when it finished, even in a cool auditorium. Words to describe how I feel (until now, a full hour after): shocked, floored, stuck, traumatized (in a good way?). This movie affected me. It destroyed me. As soon as the credits rolled, everyone in the theater started talking to each other, saying things like wow, omg, wth, BRO, while laughing in shock. These are random people I don't know. We continued to discuss it afterwards. That's never happened to me before. Don't watch this movie if the following apply to you: You are squeamish, sensitive, or easily triggered. You don't know what body horror is. You're not familiar with dark comedies. You close your eyes at scary parts. You are looking for a date movie. If the following apply to you, go see this now, without watching a trailer or reading what it's about: You are fully desensitized. You're annoyed with all the neutered PG-13 movies. You even think modern R-rated movies are too mild and don't go all out. You feel like movies are all the same or fail to stand out. The acting is great, with Demi Moore possibly giving her best performance. All technical aspects are pristine, with the sound design/mixing standing out the most. If the director wants you to hear someone chewing obnoxiously, it will sound like the mic is in his mouth. Like the rest of the movie, everything is in your face in an intentionally off-putting way. About halfway through, I was really enjoying it, but I was worried that it would go the way of many other style-over-substance movies. They rarely land for me because I need more than metaphors and deeper meanings. The Substance has those things, but still comes through with one of the most satisfying third acts I can think of. I rarely ever give 10 star ratings (excluding comedies, 13 ever). And rewatchability plays a big factor. I don't care. Even if I only watch this a couple more times, I will NEVER forget this experience, or the images that are seared into my brain forever. (1 viewing, early access screening 9/18/2024)

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